Thursday, September 13, 2007

Garth and The Overhead Projector or Everything I Ever Learned About Public Speaking I Copied From Al

Hi All.

Last night I had the honor of meeting a real life MP. Well ...large on the Me and....well....I don't want to get into the p.

But was fun. As it turns out there happened to be a hardass biker and self professed purveyor of the unvarnished truth riding into my berg. How could I resist. With this in mind I ventured forth to meet this Garthacle warrior.

Unfortunately the hardass turned out to be a candyass, the seasonable weather in Alberta had nixed the thundering Hogs for Democracy symbolic ride. I must admit I had visions of Garth roaring into the room ala Paul Tuetle Sr. but such was not the case. Instead we got a rather crappy Al Gore knockoff with half the sophistication and twice the hyperbole.

There is no need to take my word for it....a lovely pic of me and my camera man can be found at

On the other hand the raw video of the whole event will be posted here in sections as youtube allows. I must apologize for the poor content as the biker fella seemed a little off his game.

For those of you who don't have the time for the whole Garth Turner experience I suggest the last two minutes of Part 3 along with Parts 4,5 and 6 for maximum viewing pleasure.

Anyways, part one of A Lost Tory Tours or Garth Turner Unedited.

Sorry about the snickering in the background. My bad. I will be updating this post with the entire video as I get it uploaded. Trust me it does get better/worse based on your political leanings and how well developed your sense of the ridiculous is.

Here we are folks...Garth Turner Unedited Part 2 Enjoy!!

I will be adding some commentary as soon as I solve all my technical issues. I must admit I really suck at the technical aspects of all this but I am learning.

Garth Turner Unedited Part 3 is now available. This is where things get interesting.

Garth reports the outing of the con agent provocateurs (Chris and I) on his site as follows:

As usual, I did a 30-minute opening presentation, then we went open mic for the next hour. It’s seldom I get heckled during my formal shtick, but this is Calgary, home of the ugliest emails that this poor little defenseless blog receives. The fact there were two Con operatives lurking in the corner of the back row, one carefully taping my every move, became immediately obvious.

I started to feel all tingly. Finally, protestors. Be still, my heart.

Jeez Garth....immediately obvious...wha... According to the tape it was some 29 minutes into your schtick when I blew my cover.

I had been given some well reasoned advice to play it cool and attempt to trap Garth with a softball question during the Q&A and intended to do so, unfortunately I reacted to a particularly specious rhetorical question thrown out by Garth.

Once again don't take my word for it....Garth Turner Unedited Part 3

Yep...Garth's spider senses were tingling. Although I must admit it takes a skilled orator to connect the collapse of a bridge in Minnesota, an overpass in Quebec and American military spending in Iraq.

Huh...You ask. Watch the last minute again. BTW, I meant what I said...A hell of a show.

More to come.

Garth Turner Unedited Part 4

In this segment we get to the Q&A portion of the dog and pony show. At this point I would like to clarify a few things.

First, I am a member of no political party although I do blog sporadically under the Blogging Tories banner. I consider myself a small c conservative.

Secondly, all the Liberal Party functionaries were sitting on the right side of the room and the less enthusiastic amongst us on the left. Go figure. This does become pertinent once the softballs start getting tossed.

First up is a member of The Mount Royal College Liberal Association (self identified). Can anybody explain to me what the hell his question was? Anyways, I hope nobody gets hurt as Garth knocks the high hangers out of the park.

Back to our previously scheduled entertainment.

Up next...Part 5..or Garth Vader Falters.

More as it's loaded.

The penultimate edition of our little mockumentary. Garth Turner Unedited Part 5.

Garth describes the action this way:

But the big issue to hang around my poor neck once the comment period arrived? That mailers were sent out to people in Calgary, advertising the meeting, and that this was done from the office budgets of more than a dozen of my colleague MPs. As I explained, the mailings were printed by the House of Commons, stuffed into envelopes and mailed by the House, according to rules all MPs must respect. The point was also made that the prime minister uses this technique more than any other MP, flooding other ridings (like mine of Halton) with pro-government material. Like, yawn.

I left it to another person to bring up the current scandal about Conservatives laundering national election money through local ridings. Then the crowd shouted the guy down. And that was it. The two sat and grumbled for a while. Shot more videotape. But when a CBC television cameraman started mousing around their corner of the room, the ops fled.

Now is it just me or is a theme evolving...."my poor neck"..."but this is Calgary, home of the ugliest emails that this poor little defenseless blog receives"...

But I digress.

Things get a little feisty and according to my understanding of the difference between 10%ers and franked mail...well let's watch Garth explain.

The final segment soon to follow along with a few observations.

Done and done. Garth Turner Unedited Part 6

The stirring finale to A Lost Tory Tours.

Once again to clarify. We did not run from the room. I approached the LPoC functionary who offered to explain the nuances of 10%ers and franked mail to me.

According to Garth this would be the fella that shouted me down. While I admit the right side of the room offered enthusiastic applause in response to the party operative's offer to shut me up, I hardly thought I was shouted down.

Chris continued to film and I took my seat and watched as a few more softballs were tossed. The most interesting was the one from the fella in the red and white jacket. Something about a looming LPoC leadership convention. I wonder who he might support?

Next up was the local riding president to pose her second question of the evening. Two out of eight, obviously a lady with much on her mind. As I listened it occurred to me that the next move was to take the fella from the LPC up on his offer.

I approached him politely (kneeling at the edge of the aisle and getting the attention of his pretty escourt who gave him the heads up) and asked to speak with him in the hall. Being an earnest and lawyerly young fella he agreed. You can see us leaving the room on the right side of the screen.

Outside he agreed to an on camera interview to explain how Liberal Mp's communications budgets were co-ordinated to make the Lost Tory Tour the resounding success it obviously is.

Unfortunately, Chris miscued on the camera and only a few seconds at the end of our discussion are caught on tape. Considering we bought the camera at Best Buy yesterday afternoon, Chris did a fine job.

As we taped (well not taped but I explained that) outside the hall we were joined by three older gentlemen who stood off camera. Two of the three were clearly unimpressed. The third who had a decidedly sunnier disposition asked to take my picture with the young lawyer and can be heard commenting at the end of our tape, something to the effect that I asked good questions.

Regardless, that image of me is the one that appears on Garth's blog, although my lawyer friend appears to have been deleted from our photo-op. Sad really, he was a nice fella.

Garth also makes reference in his blog to the CBC cameraman. Chris gets sufficient shots of him over the duration. Here is the interesting part. The picture of Chris that appears on Garth's blog must be directly from the "CBC" camera. At no time that we were aware of did anyone other than the cameraman approach us to take pics in the meeting hall.

Now this poses a number of other questions. I'll pose those at a later date but I do encourage you to let your imagination run amok.

And finally watch the body language of Garth under questioning and the greazy eyeball he shoots at Chris when I was leaving the room.

Nuff said....Garth turner Unedited Part 6

Some final thoughts.

Chris is a young man from Cape Breton who came to Alberta to work because there in none there. On the way home he commented to me as follows:

"We don't have enough problems back home in Cape Breton that these guys have to come out here to create problems or to fix something that aint broke."

And that Mr.Turner is the real essence of what this was all about. You can wax poetic on your blog all you want, hell you can even piss our money away to promote yourself....these things are apparently all legal.

Just don't expect these two citizens to like it.

I speak for myself and Chris does the same. No conspiracy here sir. Unedited is the way to go!



I meant to do this earlier but got distracted with the tech angle of all this. Here is mypersonal invitation to last nights event as it appears on


Thanks for the clarification. BTW, as I am not a member of any political party, no membership lists will be forthcoming.

I’m also heartened to hear that no “new” money is being spent promoting your tour and assume this is “old” money that was left laying around.

Any chance you might provide a list of the 15 constituency offices who ponied up? It might make for some interesting reading.

And finally. Being neither a member of any political party or a disgruntled income trust investor, how would I go about getting an invitation to your Calgary shindig at MRC?

Is this invitation only? Tickets required?

Thanks in advance.


Dear Mr. Syncro; Please accept this invitation to attend the Valgary Town Hall meeting. The pleasure of your company is requested. — Garth

I have been taken to task on Garth's blog by a number of commentors who faithfully defend his honor and have casted aspersions on my motives. Fair enough.

Unfortunately I have been unable to respond due to unforeseen technical gremlins that will not allow me to post to

If anybody out there is familiar with any of the denizens of Garth's blog I would appreciate if you could direct them this way.




I would seem that I've been outed by a regular reader at This of course would not have been necessary had I been able to post at Garth's site but the aforementioned technical difficulties are still in effect. It seems Digital Democracy has some limitations and challenging Garth on the facts seems to be a big one.

Regardless, my outing :

Steve on 09.13.07 4:24 pm said:

So that was you huh Bob? At least get a leather jacket that has as few pieces as possible. It does look like you decided on the cheapest jacket just made out of scraps.

Nope Steve,

It wasn’t Bob. It was LLoyd, or rather it was Syncrodox as he likes to style himself. He of the tatty black vinyl jacket who is a BT tho protests that he’s really not one of them but a small “c” conservative. Whatever.

He’s put up a series of You Tube videos of Garth’s TH in Calgary. With quite the written commentary to go with it. An awful lot of explanation even before one sees the videos. Mostly to apologize for the quality and of course to get his con-style witty jabs in.

Perceptions are funny things no?


Sadly, Geo neglected to provide a link to my site. It might have been edifying for other readers of The Turner Report to get access to some Garth Unedited video.

Now it would seem that informed reader Geo and Steve before her (who in an earlier comment states he was at the meeting) take issue with my attire. Although Geo does mention my "con style witty jabs", which I assume are much different than "lib style witty jabs".

Garth offers one here in response to a commentor:

Have you started you French lessons yet? — Garth

By Myron on 09.13.07 10:08 am

May wee mon cher ami Garth. Je parlay francais oosi, ay voo ..?!

You are an embarrassment to this blog, let alone to your country. — Garth

Geo, I'm sorry my wit doesn't meet this high standard.

Now onto my leather jacket. Did you happen to notice the Canadian flag embroidered on the left chest? That jacket was given to me by my Grandfather and was bought through The Royal Canadian Legion. He wore it with pride and I choose to wear it the same way.

If it doesn't meet your fashion approval, so be it. I do also find it interesting that this was your biggest complaint, but then again in some quarters fashion probably does trump fact.

And finally Geo, I stand by my statement that I have never been a member of any political party. As you may or may not know The BT's is a blogroll in the same way Liblogs, Progblogs and Libertyblogs are. Given my self identification as a small c-conservative the Bt's is my obvious blogroll home.

Then again, perceptions are funny, no?



Anonymous said...

So much for it being a non partisan trip what with that HUGE Liberal sign in the background.

Anonymous said...

And oh yes, cant you tell its the "ALL ABOUT GARTH Tour" He talks about himself so much he must be in love with Garth no?

syncrodox said...


Right and right. Stay tuned it gets way better!


Chuckercanuck said...

Ha! Great catch on the bridges!

Apparently, Quebec's Iraq war spending is crumbling our infrastructure!

Anonymous said...

Did you forward this to Steve Janke at Angry in the Great White North?

Great stuff. Hope you enjoyed the Great Garth on his excellent adventure.

I think he has now firmly established himself as a nut job.

syncrodox said...


I guess so. I wonder how Charest is gonna splain this. Oh wait a sec, maybe that was on the other fellas watch...regardless that damn Bush started it all.


syncrodox said...


I have sent Steve Janke an e-mail regarding this and as yet have not had a response.

I did so because his insights into the nuances of parliamentary mailings coupled with dialog I had with the Garthacle inspired me to take part in the town hall experience.

I must admit I did enjoy the show.


Anonymous said...

Hes a very bitter, little man when hes challenged. When no one shows up to one of these usless liberal/garth infomercials, he begs for a fight.

When hes challenged he hides away, oh poor me these evil cons are attacking me. You didnt attack, you asked legit questions, and if you see his nervous twitches it kept me howling through most of the video.

He doesnt like to be challenged and you did so and if you read his blog on the event THEN see the raw footage, they were almost like two separate events.

Thanks ...

Anonymous said...

And when Garth said Harper and Baird sent something, THAT was 10 percenteres not franked mail. It was general mail, 10 percenters and it wasnt addressed at all. He also said they do it all the time...

One piece apparently came from PM Harper but its never been confirmed by his office, and there are serious doubts if it WAS from his office as it didnt look like anything else his office sent out. But thats beside the point, and it didnt come from Bairds office either.

It was probably a veiled attempt by the loonie left to blame the PM for such a display.

syncrodox said...


The body language in the video is telling.

I'm glad you enjoyed the raw footage, I enjoyed being there as my semi-subdued snickering indicates.

I did learn one thing seems my bullshit tolerance runs out around 29 minutes.


Richard said...

Garth had to go west, that's where all his cheerleaders live.
Halton's BS tolerance ran out long ago.

syncrodox said...


I could see that happening.


Anonymous said...

Again, in that one clip where he says every week he gets a 10 % er from Baird and Harper....thats TOTAL BS. He needs to be called out on his lying.

Local Halton media has been informed.

syncrodox said...


Ouch..that could leave a mark.


WL Mackenzie Redux said...

Syncro: Thanks for putting the lost Tory tour in the film can for posterity....future generations will want to know how kleptocratic operating policy, zombie-like partisan politics and grotesquely deformed egos in political culture destroyed what little chance we had at workable democratic federalism.

The videos put these 3 elements of our demise in clear source-articulated reality.

BTW: Turner and the Turner Blog Quislings have done for economics what Gore did for pure science.

syncrodox said...


His recent comments about "Gonzo Alberta" pretty much make your case.



Scooter Van Neuter said...

Okay, because I'm not a Canadian, I have not the foggiest idea of who this Garth guy is, but it's obvious you and your friend are doing a "Michael Moore" on this poor fellow simply because he got enlightened and become a liberal.

While it's nice to see you've taken this cub reporter job to heart, it's unfortunate you're using it for evil instead of good.

Scooter peace out.

PS: A Cocker Spaniel using a camera phone could produce more spectacular cinematography, in case you didn't know.

PSS: A blind Cocker Spaniel at that, using one of those really cheap camera phones.

WL Mackenzie Redux said...

We note that scooter's "enlightened Liberalism" does not elevate him above making snide contemptuous insults.

How enlightened, How typical.

As has been amply demonstrated in the past half century (and in both Garth's and scooter's craven vindictiveness): Modern Liberalism is a personality disorder disguised as a political philosophy....

It is moral compromise justified by corrupted equivalence dialectics...

It is moral cowardice cloaked in detached synthetic compassion.

syncrodox said...


Good to see that your Berkley internet link works north of the 49th.(frozen gigabites and all that)

FYI Garth is basically our equivalent of Al Gore with a little John Edwards thrown in for good measure. Basically hyperbole and hair.

Garth recently ventured into western Canada to set us hicks straight, at "no additional cost to the taxpayer".

Seeing as how this wasn't going to cost anything extra I decided to take part in the fun.

As far as Mr. Moore goes, well we don't bother with sneaky editing. Hence the Garth Turner Unedited sub tittle. Well that and the fact Garth calls his blog the same but has been busted for editing.

So now you know.


p.s. My camera man Chris is pissed at you for slagging Cocker Spaniels and is considering contacting PETA.

p.s.s I have decided that reporting on cubs is best left to Disney and am now concentrating on the weasel beat.

syncrodox said...


I pretty much agree with your assessment of liberalism.

I spent a few years in the social services "industry" and from what I could see it pretty much revolves around platitudes and faux compassion. The sicker helping the sick.

Scooter Van Neuter is a whole different kind of liberal. Former sidekick to Peace Moonbeam of the Peace Moonbeam Chronicles and current editor in chief of Scooters Report, Scooter takes his liberalism somewheres left of moonbat.

I think he/she/it may be a closet conservative.

Some links to Peace and Scooter.

Peace seems to be on hiatus but Scooter always brightens my day.


Halton Resident said...

Garth's comment that he gets 10%'ers and personally addressed franked mail from the PM, Baird & Prentice every week must only be directed at his house up in Campbellville. I live in the south part of Halton riding and I have never been sent ANY franked mail from anyone other than Garth himself. So either Garth is REAL important to be getting so much personal mail from the CPC Cabinet or he's stretching the truth --- like that's never happened before!

People around here don't pay Garth any attention anymore. The only comment I do hear about him is how he has lost all credibility because he can't decide which party to stick with - and this is coming from long standing Liberals in Halton!

syncrodox said...

Halton Res

Garth stretching the truth....hmmmmm...I wonder. LOL.