Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Live Blogging State of the Union Address or Speech 347

I decided to try my hand at live blogging tonight partly inspired by this drinking game courtesy of The Huffington Post

The regular script is my objective interpretation of POTUS , the italisized script my own voice.


7:14 Barry's on !!

7:15 Things were really shitty when I took over, I'm here now and the worst has passed

7:16 First mention of change....first shot of the night!

7:17 So far the TOTUS is performing brilliantly.

7:19 Biden can't seem to get with the clapping program....another shot

7:21 Bad Bankers...standing O

7:22 Barry channels Ronald Reagan. Tax cuts

7:24 Wha?...Tax cuts led to 2 million jobs...firemen, teachers, cops....there is so much wrong with this that I'm gonna take three shots

7:27 30 billion for jobs Yay!!!!

7:28 Tax cuts for small business, big business, funny business etc...

7:30 First mention of green jobs...another shot!

7:32 Were #1...Were #1...

7:35 I'm serious now...banks bad....but banks are good...something something..cancer...clean energy....another shot....climategate...CLIMATEGATE....nuclear energy...NUCLEAR ENERGY....offshore oil drilling...WTF OFFSHORE OIL DRILLING.....

7:38 I must be drunk already

7:40 Maybe not...free trade that sounds like protectionism...that's better.

7:42 Race for the Top or No Child Left Behind......same thing.....another shot

7:43 Free University....crack the keg!!!!!!

7:45 Second mortgage and Healthcare reform....no sweat....refinance silly!!

7:48 Michelle is tackling fat kids...thanks Honey

7:49 We'll reduce the deficit by 1 trillion over twenty years.....time to drink again

7:50 Healthcare reform alone will not reduce the deficit...drinking time again

7:51 George Bush you asshole...unpaid wars......

7:52 Spending freeze....and don't make me call Vito!

7:55 Arcane shit...time to drink

7:57 George Bush you colossal asshole

8:00 We are the first WhiteHouse that twitters!

8:01 No more foreign money for election campaigns....just to bankroll government operations

8:03 Play politics nice please....pretty please

8:05 I screwed up the super majority so you Republicans are on the hook now too.

8:06 911...defence and hope...three shots

8:07 Troop surge Afstan plus the Arabs love us!

8:08 I won the war in Iraq in only a year....drinks all around!!

8:10 Michelle and Joe are on the military family file....god help them

8:11 North Korea and Iran....consequences......oooohhhhh!!

8:12 muslims..climate change...haiti....afstan girls...freedom...just take a shot when you want

8:15 Gay marines...equal pay...oops lost the feed..grab a drink

8:19 Cynicism, dissapointment....Change You can Believe In....don't blame it on me..it's you dummies that don't get how smart I am

8:21 Haiti twice and USA...USA....Crack another bottle

Syncro

11 comments:

Scooter Van Neuter said...

Nice job, now I know what Barry said without having to listen to the lying a-hole.

Thanks.

Anonymous said...

Very Funny!! Bet you are now blissfully drunk.

I tried to watch and could not stomach the lies for more than 3 minutes.

MariaS

syncrodox said...

Your welcome Scooter. I decided to do some American blogging since the only thing going on around here is something about perogies.

Hmmmm perogies....

Syncro

syncrodox said...

MariaS

Urp...

Syncro

Patsplace said...

Syncro, Go to Bed. There's nothing worse than a drunk live blogger in the middle of a perogie binge. Cover the children's eyes Martha.

Thanks for the LB

Patg

syncrodox said...

Patg

Good idea....i don;t feel soo good..

Syncro

The_Iceman said...

I thought it was telling that today Evan Soloman was running video footage of Scott Brown's acceptance speech over the caption "Death of Conservatism: Republicans have become too ideological". That's right, Republicans winning a Senate seat in the Liberal stronghold of Massachusetts that has not elected a Conservative Senator in 30 years is a clear sign that Conservatism is dying due to their extreme ideology. Granted, that is the type of partisan spin that I have come to expect from Evan Soloman and the CBC.

The Grey Lady said...

Thanks for your very funny running commentary of the speech,For me highlight of the night was when he took responsibility for Two million, you count 'em, Two million jobs and then rattles off all public servants positions. What a hoot it is when you can brag about increasing taxpayer obligations and build your own fiefdom at the same time. Two million additional parasites the American taxpayer will find hard to scrape off.

syncrodox said...

Ice

ES is a piece of work alright.

GL

Barry displays some fine lefty logic on that point...yikes!

Syncro

Anonymous said...

Syncro - I think Scooter owes you royalties or something on this post. Don't tell him, but your post is funnier. Teresa

syncrodox said...

Teresa

I just hold my booze better than Scooter.

Syncro